Age 14/15? | 1982/83? Oh wow… ANOTHER ‘Who’s Who‘ Page! A great way of filling publications’ pages with easy, cheap, content.

I bet you’re excited to see another one of these. Calm down, calm down. Breathe slowly, just breathe. Caaaaaaaalm…

OK, here we go: Apparently See-Threepio is a

“A tall, humanlike, bronze, interpreter droid.”

Is that it? Why do we need to be told what colour he is? What about his personality? How he’s sarcastic, short-tempered, nervous, and cowardly. But, impressively, how he’ll sometimes risk his neck to help others—when pushed—despite being permanently terrified. Now that, paradoxically, is real bravery.

And Artoo-Detoo who—best friend Threepio seems to parent in some ways, for better or worse—could have been described right off as a plucky, brave, loyal little droid, with childlike qualities.  “Information retrieval robot” is pretty dry and boring. It’s like describing yourself by your profession. “Oh, I’m an accountant That’s it. There’s nothing more to say about myself.”

Yoda, is also a wise, but sometimes quite cheeky and crafty fellow, with a good sense of humour. But he never lets that cloud his judgement.

For Darth, it looks like I might have started to write ‘devil’ then scribbled out the ‘d’. Hard to tell. And, I could have said: Darth was Luke’s dad’s best friend. But Darth (literally) murdered Luke’s dad—who was an entirely separate person) after turning to evil. Or… was Ben Kenobi just bullshitting Luke?

I was going to say, there’s not much more to say about today’s page. But then as usual, I found lots. Still, I’m sorry that you’re getting such slim-pickings because the adaptation of Empire Strikes Back prematurely terminated. (<You can read why it might have done, here). I’m basically just sticking it out to the end now and being a completist. I won’t show you a photo of the staples. There aren’t any. Although I could show you the other unused, stupid Empire Strikes Back alphabet stickers which were tucked into the comic, but I hardly think that would be of much interest.

Oh wait!—you might be interested in that blue marker ink that’s bleeding through from the other side of this page. Those of you who can use image editing software might like to flip it and get a sneeky peek, otherwise, I’ll reveal the page on Wednesday 😉 It’s cool.

Post your comments below—if you’ve enjoyed it. Thanks.